17 Signs He Never Loved You (Even If You Think They Do)

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If you’re like most people, you want to believe that your partner loves you.

But it’s easy to lose yourself in all the things that make a relationship work; the fun dates, the laughs, the sex…

And sometimes, when we’re so wrapped up in our heads about how great our relationships are supposed to be, we don’t really notice what’s happening right in front of us.

And Allow Me to Ask You One Thing…

Have you ever been in a relationship where you thought your partner loved you, only to find out that they didn’t? I know that it’s a heartbreaking feeling and one that many of us have experienced. 

But there are often signs that someone doesn’t love you, even if it’s not obvious at first.

In this blog post, we’ll take a look at 17 Signs He Never Loved You (Even If You Think They Do). By understanding these signs, you can start to realize whether the person you’re with truly loves you or not.

How Can You Tell If Your Partner Really Loves You?

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1). As with any relationship, it’s vital to pay attention to the signs that your partner loves you or not. You can start by looking for signs of vulnerability, such as open communication and trust. These are indicators that your partner is truly invested in the relationship. 

2). Additionally, consider how much effort your partner puts into the relationship. If the two of you spend time together, do things together, or go on dates often, this is a good sign that he cares about the relationship. 

3). Also, consider how supportive your partner is of your goals and ambitions. If he encourages you to pursue your dreams and ambitions, this is a clear sign that he loves and values you as a person. 

4). Finally, evaluate if your partner is willing to make sacrifices for you. If he is willing to do things for you without expecting anything in return, this is another sign that he loves and respects you. 

See How Attentively He Listens to You

If you’re wondering if your partner is in love with you, one sign he never loved you is that he rarely listens to you, or he may constantly interrupt or talk over you, not giving you the chance to express your opinion or feelings.

If your partner pretends to love you but actually doesn’t, ask yourself:

  • Does he seem to zone out when you tell him something important? 
  • Does he struggle to recall even the smallest details about your day? 
  • Does he actually listen to what you say?

If your concern is yes to the above questions, then he is likely to ‌listen to what you say; if not, then consider that he is not listening and does not have any genuine interest in your life.

If your partner does not make any effort to listen to you or truly understand what you are saying, it could be a sign that he never really loved you. 

He may be dismissive or unresponsive when you try to open up to him, or he may simply brush aside your concerns. 

You should also take note if he rarely has anything meaningful to say in response to what you share with him. 

If your partner was never truly interested in hearing what you had to say, then I think it’s time to move on and find someone who will listen and appreciate you.

Related Reading: 17 Crazy Ways to Get Him Interested Again

Does He Support You?

A partner is someone you can rely on for emotional and moral support. Ideally, your partner should be someone you can trust to be there for you when you are down and encourage you to keep going. 

However, if your partner no longer seems concerned about your feelings or is expecting you to deal with situations alone, it means he does not love you. 

17 Obvious Signs That He Never Loved You

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There are some obvious signs that can help you tell whether or not he ever really loved you. One of the most obvious signs is if he never says “I love you” to you. If this is the case, it’s highly unlikely that he ever truly loved you. 

Of course, I’m not saying that this is the only sign that he doesn’t love you if he never says I love you.

If he has been pretending to love you, then it is possible that he has feelings for you but is not willing to express them in a meaningful way. 

Another indication that he never loved you is if he rarely shows any kindness or consideration towards you. If he doesn’t take the time to show appreciation for the little things you do for him or support your dreams and ambitions, then this is a sign that he doesn’t care about you.

You should also consider how accepting he is of your flaws. If he is constantly criticizing you or belittling you, then this could be a sign that he doesn’t love you.

On the other hand, if he is understanding and accepting of your mistakes and always encourages you to be better, then it’s likely that he does care about you.

Take notice of his efforts to make your relationship work. Does he try to make time for you and take an active interest in your life?

Or does he avoid spending time with you and act like your relationship isn’t a priority? If it’s the latter, then it could be a sign that he never really loved you. 

I know, sometimes It’s arduous to accept that he never loved you. But that’s not all, look out for other signs too so you can make a better decision about whether to stay in the relationship or move on.

Here are 17 signs he never loved you in the first place

1). He Doesn’t Care About Your Needs Or Wants

Are there certain things you need in a relationship?

Does your partner listen to even the little things that you want?

It’s essential that partners communicate their wants and needs in a relationship. If you are not getting what you need out of this relationship, then It might not be the one for you.

Express what it is you need from your partner. And if he puts in the effort to make things happen you may be growing as a couple for the better.

But if he does not seem to care or respond to what it is you need from him, it’s likely he does not love you enough to care for you.

Don’t worry, there is someone out there who will.

2). He Is Not Making Any Effort

If you’re dating someone who doesn’t put in any effort towards the relationship, there’s a good chance that he doesn’t love you.

This could be because he isn’t emotionally invested in the relationship or because he has lost interest in you over time. Either way, it’s clear that he doesn’t care about your feelings.

When you try to bring up the topic of emotions and feelings with him, he avoids the discussion. This shows that he isn’t comfortable talking about such sensitive matters.

To further prove his lack of affection, he never goes to show you care or affection. He barely says ‘congratulations’ when you achieve something positive in your life, too.

3). He Is Hot and Cold

Have you ever felt your partner back away just as you were about to get close to them? He treats you nicely one day, but the next, he ignores you.

If your partner is hot and cold, this does not necessarily indicate that he is bipolar…But he has no idea how to deal with his feelings for you.

When he feels like it, he can be quite kind and attentive, but he can also be cold and aloof.

A person who loves you will be consistent in their behaviors, thoughts, and feelings; they will not change their feelings for you on the spur of the moment.

It’s likely that your partner doesn’t care about you at all if he acts like he adores you one day and detests you the next.

4). There Is Sexual Activity, But Not Making Love

If the sexual activity in your relationship is simply not genuine and if it’s more about satisfying his needs than truly making love with you, then this is a sign that he never really cared for you. 

Even if he makes an effort to be physically intimate with you, if it’s not heartfelt, then it’s still a sign that he never really loved you. 

Another sign is if he’s only willing to engage in physical activity when it’s convenient for him, or when there are no emotional risks involved.

This can mean that he doesn’t care enough about you to invest in a meaningful relationship, and he would rather keep things on a surface level.

5). He’ll Try to Change You

When your partner cares about you, they want you to be your best self. They urge you to live a healthy lifestyle, treat people with kindness and compassion, and go for your aspirations.

But when they strive to transform you into someone else entirely, that’s not love. It’s controlling.

This is especially true if they are attempting to alter your personality or fundamental beliefs. If someone cannot accept you for who you are at your core, it is unlikely that they will ever truly love you.

6). He Doesn’t Treat You Nicely

You need to analyze whether he treats you nicely or not. If you find yourself constantly feeling undervalued or belittled, then chances are that your partner never truly cared for you in the first place. 

Even if he pretends to be kind and loving to you, pay close attention to how he acts when things don’t go their way or when he gets upset. 

Does he take it out on you? 

Does he make hurtful remarks or shout at you? 

If so, this could be a sign that he never really loved you. In order to accept that he never loved you, look for any signs that he doesn’t really care about your feelings. 

For example:

1). Does he show little regard for your feelings when it comes to big decisions?

2). Do you feel like he is rarely understanding or sympathetic when you need support? 

If your partner rarely takes the time to listen and understand where you’re coming from, this is a sign as well. 

If he rarely apologizes for his mistakes and hardly ever expresses regret for hurting you, this is another sign he pretends to love you but doesn’t actually care.

Remember that if someone truly loves and respects you, they would never treat you badly on purpose. 

7). He Does Not Compromise

If you’re in a relationship that’s all about your partner, and not about partnership or equality, you might be with someone who doesn’t love you.

But in a healthy relationship, both partners are willing to compromise. They make sacrifices for each other and ensure that they both feel like they’re getting what they need out of the relationship.

If your partner is unwilling to compromise for you, it means they just don’t care enough. They don’t see your needs as equally important as theirs.

Or maybe they know that you’ll do whatever it takes to make them happy so they don’t feel like they need to do anything for you.

8). He Regularly Dismisses Your Feelings

a woman covering her face with her hands

Do you ever feel like you’re talking to a brick wall when you try to explain your thoughts or concerns to your partner?

He could even make you feel bad for those feelings in the first place or attempt to make them seem insignificant so that they won’t have to cope with what you’re going through.

Or even worse, belittle you by calling you insane, irrational, or self-centred.


In a healthy relationship, people listen to each other and respect one another’s feelings and opinions.

Someone who consistently rejects what you have to say and doesn’t appear to be interested in hearing your point of view is most likely not as concerned about you as they should be.

9). He Keeps Secrets From You

I know everyone has secrets, but when they influence your relationship, that’s a major red flag.

Any relationship must be built on trust, and you cannot trust someone if they are hiding information from you.

Whether your partner is withholding anything from their history or simply frightened of how you will respond to the truth, being kept in the dark about something that impacts your relationship is evident.

Certain individuals are simply naturally more private than others, but if your partner is concealing significant information from you on a regular basis, it may be a reason for concern.

10). He Doesn’t Talk to You About the Future

If your partner doesn’t talk about the future with you, it’s because they don’t see you in it.

He probably doesn’t want to commit because he may be more concerned with where his life is headed than with where yours is going.

He may not love you as much as you believe he does.

If your partner can’t bring himself to discuss the future with you, even if he claims to want to be with you forever and ever, it’s a fairly strong indication that he doesn’t really care about what happens between the two of you in the future.

I know, It can be extremely painful to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love you back. However, now that you are aware of the warning signs, you can at least make an effort to avoid suffering heartache.


You deserve to be with someone who will treat you well and make you feel loved every day. Don’t settle for anything less.

11). You Are Not His First Priority

Not being a priority in a relationship can be a sign that the other person does not love you. He doesn’t put your needs above his own and instead prioritizes other things or people. 

He might care more about his job, his friends, or other relationships, which could make you feel like he doesn’t care about you.

Even if he makes plans with you, it is likely that he will cancel them at the last minute in order to attend to something else. 

He also doesn’t take your feelings into account when making decisions, which can leave you feeling like you don’t matter.

If your partner seems to be constantly putting himself before you, then it’s a sign he pretends to love you but doesn’t really care. 

Accepting that he never loved you is difficult, but it is important to recognize this so you can move forward in life without him.

12). He Doesn’t Make Time For You

If your partner is always cancelling plans with you or just not making time to see you, he may not be as interested in your relationship as he is letting on.

When he doesn’t adjust to the time spent with you, doesn’t make any effort to find time for you, and shows little to no interest in spending time with you, this is a sign that he doesn’t love you and that it’s best to move on. He may pretend to love you, but his actions are a giveaway. 

I know, we’re all busy; but when you care about someone, you make time for them, even if it means making sacrifices.

If your partner isn’t willing to do that for you, then it’s possible that he does not care about you as much.

He may offer excuses such as being too busy or tired to spend time with you, but if this happens frequently, it means he is not putting in any effort and has no intention of doing so. 

I’m not saying that a relationship should be all about you, but it’s pretty obvious when someone is putting you in second place.

13). He Frequently Criticizes You

If your partner is constantly criticizing or belittling you, it could be a sign that they don’t genuinely love you.

Even though ‌your partner may make it seem like they are trying to help you, constantly criticizing your decisions and actions indicates that they do not care about your feelings.

If it seems like your partner is always putting you down, this may be a sign that he never truly loved you.

It is important to differentiate between constructive criticism and just plain negativity. 

Constructive criticism can help you grow as a person, but if your partner’s criticisms feel like personal attacks or insults, this is not a good sign. 

They may be telling you that they are disappointed in you and are trying to manipulate your behavior to match their ideal version of you.

If your partner is always pointing out your flaws and criticizing you, accepting that he never loved you can be an important step in moving on from the relationship. 

Acknowledging that the relationship was never going to work out can help you move forward and focus on taking care of yourself and building a better life. 

Once you accept the signs he doesn’t love you, it will become easier to stop trying to please him and start focusing on yourself.

14). He Didn’t Ever Say I Love You

If your ex never says “I love you” or doesn’t seem to care about you the way you want them to, it could be one of the signs that they never loved you.

While saying “I love you” often doesn’t necessarily mean that the person actually loves you, sincere expressions of affection are important in any relationship. 

If your ex made promises to you but didn’t follow through, it could mean that they weren’t invested in the relationship. In other words, it could be a sign that they never truly cared for you.

All you wanted was for your ex to understand how serious you were about the relationship and not make empty promises. 

So if your ex is not saying, “I love you,” or doing anything to show that they care, get yourself checked out!

You are worthy of love. Don't allow yourself to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn't truly care for you—find someone who will treat you the way you deserve.

15). He Compares You to Other People

If your partner compares you to their exes or other people in general, it’s a sign that he doesn’t really see you as an individual, and he doesn’t respect the relationship enough to value it as something unique and special. 

He may also compare you to his ex in a positive light, creating insecurities and making you feel inadequate.

He may stop complimenting you or noticing changes you make as he has grown used to the way things are.

This can cause him to feel like you are not good enough or capable of providing what he needs.

They might mean well, but this kind of behavior just makes you feel like you don’t measure up – and will always put you in competition with someone else.

You should feel confident around your partner; not like they’re always trying to tear you

16). He Doesn’t Want You to Meet His Friends And Family

You may be wondering why your partner is making excuses for not meeting your friends. Perhaps he doesn’t want to connect with your friends in any way, as he may not be interested in the same things or hobbies that you are. 

When someone loves you, they understand that the people in your life are important to you, which is why your partner should try to get along with the people closest to you.

If you find yourself defending your loved ones, or feel the need to excuse your partner’s behavior, then you might want to re-evaluate your relationship with this person.

Moreover, he may not want to meet your friends because of past experiences or relationships with them. He may also refuse to plan anything nice for you, possibly for the same reason.

17). You Feel Lonely, Even When He Is With You

There’s a difference between feeling alone because you’re surrounded by people who don’t understand you and feeling alone when you’re with someone who’s supposed to love you.

When you feel lonely around your partner, it means that they are physically close but emotionally distant.

You might feel like your partner isn’t really present in your relationship or like they’re only with you when it benefits them.

This could be a sign that they aren’t capable of really loving. 

Love is about connection.

“If the two of you are always in a separate world, even when you’re both in the same room together, then it’s likely that your bond is not as strong as it should be.”

Signs He Never Loved You – Youtube Video

Tips For Moving On From A Person Who Never Loved You

If your ex never loved you, sometimes it is essential to focus on yourself and let go of any reminders of your ex. This will help you move on and focus on the future.

To help you move on, it’s also important to do physical things and pay attention to yourself. Making new friends and surrounding yourself with people who appreciate and love you will also help you heal. 

If your ex never made an effort to make things work, this is a sign that they have lost interest. It is vital to reach out to old friends and make amends so that you can heal and learn from the experience.

Never Doubt that You Are Not Worthy Of Love

You deserve to be in a relationship with somebody who loves and cherishes you as much as you do them. Although it may not seem fair, the truth is that no one can truly love you if they don’t see your worth.

So take a good, hard look at your partner’s behavior and be honest with yourself about his flaws.

Don’t let what you want to see in him fool you, and be aware of the warning signs that he doesn’t love you. 


Every moment spent with someone who doesn’t value you is a moment that could be spent with someone who does.

This way, you’ll know whether or not the person has the potential to bring out the best in you. 

And last but not least, don’t let anybody tell you that you aren’t worthy of powerful and unconditional love.

In this world full of heartache, it’s important to remember to never doubt that you are worthy of love.

Think He Does Not Deserve You

Have you been in a relationship where you felt he cared for you more than you cared for him?

It might be time to take a step back and think about the relationship. Are there any red flags that indicate he does not deserve you?

Perhaps there is someone else out there who could love and care for you as much as he does.

Start with the basics – getting to know the person better next time. Develop a relationship based on trust, respect, and affection.

Communicate your needs clearly and directly. There are no shortcuts in love, but taking the time to invest in a relationship can lead to a healthy, loving one.

Think You Deserve More 

If you’ve been in a relationship with an ex who is giving you mixed signals, it may be time to consider the possibility that your ex-boyfriend never truly loved you.

If you constantly felt like you deserved more in the relationship and your partner always insisted on doing things his way, it would be a clear sign that he didn’t care about you as much as he claimed.

When you feel something is off in the relationship, look out for signs that your partner doesn’t love you. This could mean that he cheats on you or doesn’t care about how you feel or what you need.

It’s essential to cultivate self-love and focus on receiving the same love in return when you love again.

After Realizing He Never Loved Me, How Can I Stop Feeling Less Deserving?

If a relationship ends and you realize that the other person didn’t love you as much as you loved them, it can be heartbreaking I know. However, it doesn’t mean that your value has been reduced. 

You must remember that the end of the relationship does not reduce your value or make you less worthy than your ex.

Take a deep breath and avoid forcing things. This will help you accept reality and not overthink the breakup. 

Focus on yourself and love yourself more. Cultivate self-love and embrace your uniqueness.

Also, don’t be afraid to be alone. It’s better than having your heart broken again.

Try to Take a Deep Breath and Confront Reality

Love is a key component of any relationship, and it is important to recognize if there are signs of unrequited love.

  • understand the red flags that indicate your partner doesn’t feel the same way about you.
  • Signs of unrequited love may include being ‌always critical of your partner, never wanting to spend time with you, and always putting their own needs first.
  • Indifference, treating you as a backup plan, and a lack of sacrifice can also be indicators that your partner never loved you. If you notice these behaviors becoming more common in your relationship, it could be a sign that your partner isn’t loving you the way you need or want.

It’s okay to acknowledge and accept the fact that your partner didn’t show any signs of love for you. However, it is vital to learn to love yourself first and never give up on love.

Learn to Manage Your Emotions

You have to be able to process and acknowledge your emotions. This will help you make better decisions and develop healthy relationships.

When you feel overwhelmed by your emotions, try taking time to process them. This may involve journaling or talking with a trusted friend or family member.

It can also be helpful to cut off contact with people who are hurting you in the form of texts, emails, social media posts, or even phone calls.

Regularly taking time to nourish yourself can help keep your mood balanced.

Start by eating healthy meals and adding in activities such as walking or gardening for fresh air.

Getting enough sleep and spending time with family and friends can also be great ways to stay healthy and happy.

It can be helpful to practice healthy communication with loved ones in order to create positive relationships that are based on trust and respect.


I know it hurts when you love someone and you don’t get enough love in return, but now as you know, it’s up to you if you want to keep the relationship.

Also, if you have any questions leave me a comment below, I would love to have your thoughts on it.

Hey there, I'm Khursheed Alam! I started the Deeplines blog to help people benefit from my content. I really believe in loving yourself and being kind, so my goal is to spread that message everywhere. In my free time, I read novels, self-development, and writing books.

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