What Happens When You Stop Chasing an Avoidant? (Facts You Need to Know)

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Are you tired of chasing after someone who always seems to be running away? Have you ever considered what would happen if you stopped pursuing an avoidant person?

I know at some point, we all have experienced the pain of unrequited love, but sometimes taking a step back and reassessing our approach can lead to unexpected outcomes. 

In this blog post, we’ll explore the possibilities that come when we stop chasing an avoidant partner and how it can bring positive changes in our lives.

So let’s dive in!

Here’s What Happens When You Stop Chasing an Avoidant

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If you are reading this I guess you have been hurt by an avoidant partner and you may not know how to get over this pain and move on with your life. 

Here is what happens when you stop chasing an avoidant partner.

1). You Will Feel Relief 

If you’ve been chasing an avoidant partner, you know the drill. You pursue them relentlessly, trying to get their attention and affection, but it seems like they’re always just out of reach.

Eventually, you get tired of the chase and you give up. And that’s when something amazing happens.

When you stop chasing an avoidant partner, you finally start to feel relief.

It’s a huge weight off your shoulders to know that you don’t have to keep pursuing someone who doesn’t want to be caught.

You can focus your energy on other things, like your own happiness.

And while it may take some time to get used to being single again, eventually you’ll realize that it’s better than chasing someone who was never going to love you the way you deserve.

So if you’re ready to put an end to the chase, here are three things you need to do:

1. Let go of the idea that they will change.

If your partner has shown time and time again that they’re not interested in changing, it’s time to let that idea go.

Holding onto hope is only going to make the situation worse.

2. Cut off all communication.

This may seem harsh, but it’s necessary if you want to move on. Avoiding all contact with your ex will help you heal and move on with your life.

3. Focus on yourself.

Now that you’re no longer chasing someone who isn’t interested, you can focus on yourself and work on building a life that makes you happy.

This can be anything from taking up a new hobby to spending more time with friends.

The bottom line is, if you’re tired of chasing an avoidant partner, it’s time to stop. Take the steps necessary to let go and move on with your life. You’ll be thankful you did.

2). The Avoidant Person Will Realize What They’re Missing

When you stop chasing an avoidant, the person will realize just how much they are missing out on. Even if they don’t want to admit it, Avoidants care when you leave. 

They expect you to continue to chase them and show them attention. When that doesn’t happen, they start to miss the connection and companionship that you gave them. 

On some level, they will realize that you have moved on and that can be a wake-up call for them. It can also be a reality check for them to realize what they are missing out on. 

The realization that someone was there for them and now is gone is something that Avoidants may not be used to.

3). They Stop Trying To Connect With You

A man and a woman holding hands together

When you stop chasing an avoidant, it can be a huge relief. After all, if you were pursuing them, chances are they weren’t responding to your advances or making any real effort to get to know you. 

When you make the decision to stop trying to connect with them, they might feel a bit lost. Avoidants care when you leave and expect you to chase them, but when you move on, they realize what they’re missing. 

They may start to feel lonely and realize the importance of connection. This is when they start to wonder why you left and may begin to make more of an effort to reconnect. 

Even though they may be reluctant to open up, you may find that they start to reach out to you more often, demonstrating that they do care about the relationship.

This is because they realize that they don’t have your attention anymore, and they want it back. 

If they do come back, don’t fall for their games. Remember that they’re just trying to get your attention, and they’ll move on again as soon as they get what they want.

If the avoidant doesn’t come back, don’t worry. You’re better off without them. They weren’t giving you the attention and connection that you deserve anyway. 

Sooner or later, you’ll find someone who does want to be with you – someone who isn’t afraid of intimacy and connection.

4). They Become Accustomed to Living Without You

When you stop chasing an avoidant, they may experience a sense of relief. They have been expecting you to chase them and, when you don’t, they can suddenly feel liberated.

This could be an opportunity for them to learn to become self-reliant and independent without relying on someone else. 

The lack of neediness and demands that they experience when you stop chasing them can be a beneficial experience for them. 

They may have become accustomed to living without you. This is because avoidants typically prefer to be alone and do not seek out close relationships. 

However, if you were in a close relationship with an avoidant before, of course, they may miss the closeness and intimacy that you shared.

5). You’ll Be Able to Focus On Your Own Happiness

When you stop chasing ‌‌avoidance, you can finally begin to focus on your own happiness. 

The cycle of chasing, feeling disappointed, and repeating the same process is over. 

Avoidants expect you to chase them and make them feel desired, but when you move on, they can’t ignore it and care. 

You’ll have the opportunity to invest your energy into yourself and start working towards a better future.

This can help you feel empowered and lead to greater self-esteem. You won’t be limited by someone else’s expectations anymore, which gives you the freedom to pursue what truly makes you happy.

6). You’ll Have More Time For Yourself

If you’re in a relationship with someone who is avoidant, you may find yourself always chasing after them. It can be exhausting and leave you feeling unfulfilled. 

But what happens if you stop chasing an avoidant? 

For starters, you’ll likely have more time for yourself. And that’s not a bad thing! You can use this time to focus on your own happiness and well-being. 

Maybe you’ll pick up a new hobby or spend more time with friends and family. Whatever you do, make sure it’s something that brings you joy. 

Additionally, stopping the chase can be a huge relief. No longer will you feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells around your partner. 

This newfound freedom can help improve your relationship overall. After all, healthy relationships are built on trust, communication, and mutual respect – none of which can be fostered when one person is always chasing after the other.

7). You Find Someone Better

A man and woman hugging each other

When you stop chasing an avoidant and move on, it sends a signal that you are worth more than what they can offer. 

It can be scary to think about, but once you take the plunge and find someone better, you’ll be glad you did. 

They may not express it, but deep down, they do care when you move on. 

Avoidants are often afraid of intimacy and commitment, which can make them difficult to be in a long-term relationship with. 

If you’re tired of being the one who is always chasing,.

Here’s what you can do.

1). Talk to your partner about your feelings and explain that you need more than what they’re giving you. If they’re unwilling to open up or work on the relationship, then it may be time to move on. 

2). Take some time for yourself. Focus on your own happiness and don’t let your partner control your life. You deserve someone who will love and appreciate you for who you are. 

If you find someone better, don’t be afraid to let go of the past. Letting go can be hard, but it’s sometimes necessary in order to move forward.

8) You Become Stronger And More Independent

It can be really tough to let go of someone you care for, even if they don’t seem to be reciprocating your feelings. 

But sometimes, it’s necessary in order to move on and find someone who is willing to give you the attention and love you deserve. 

When you stop chasing an avoidant person, you become stronger and more independent. You learn to value yourself more and realize that you deserve better. 

As a result, you become a better catch for someone who is actually ready to commit. So don’t be afraid to let go of that person who isn’t giving you what you need. It’s not worth your time and energy.

What Happens When You Stop Chasing an Avoidant?

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When you stop chasing an avoidant, you may feel a sense of relief at first. This is because you are no longer putting yourself in a situation where you are constantly worrying about being rejected or hurt. 

However, you may also feel a sense of loss and loneliness. This is because you are no longer in a relationship with someone who you care for deeply.

How to Cope When an Avoidant Leaves?

When an avoidant person leaves, it can be difficult to cope.

Here are some tips:

  1. Allow yourself to grieve. It’s normal to feel sadness, anger, and confusion when someone you care about leaves. Give yourself time to process your emotions.
  2. Talk to a friend or therapist. It can be helpful to talk to someone who will understand and can offer support.
  3. Focus on taking care of yourself. This is a difficult time, so make sure to do things that make you happy and help you relax.

The Benefits Of Stopping the Chase

When you stop chasing an avoidant, you may feel like you are losing something. You may feel like you are missing out on something great. 

However, there are actually many benefits to stopping the chase. 

Here are a few of them:

1. You will save yourself a lot of time and energy. 

Chasing an avoidant can be extremely draining, both emotionally and physically. When you finally stop, you will have so much more time and energy to devote to other things in your life.

2. You will no longer be putting yourself in a position to be hurt. 

Constantly chasing after someone who does not want to be caught is a recipe for disaster. Sooner or later, you are bound to get hurt. When you stop chasing the avoidant, you no longer put yourself in this vulnerable position.

3. You will be able to focus on finding someone who actually wants to be caught by you.

There is plenty of fish in the sea – why waste your time chasing one that does not want to be caught? 

When you stop chasing the avoidant, you open yourself up to finding someone who is actually interested in being in a relationship with you.

4. You may find that the avoidant was not actually worth your time and energy anyway. 

Once you step back and take a look at the situation objectively, you may realize that the person you were chasing was not actually worth your time. 

They may have been toxic, unfulfilled, or just not that into you. In this case, it is best to move on and find someone who is a better match for you.

The Effects Of Chasing an Avoidant

Chasing an avoidant can be a fruitless endeavor that can cause a great deal of unnecessary pain and heartache. 

Despite the difficulties involved in pursuing someone who does not appear interested in reciprocating your affections, there are certain effects to consider when deciding whether it is worth your time and energy. 

1). The most notable effect of chasing an avoidant is that it can ultimately cause them to take notice and possibly even care about you, as you have proven that you are willing to go to great lengths to have them in your life. 

Although it is possible to win them over with consistent effort, this success often comes with a price. 

By chasing an avoidant, you may cause them to feel smothered and suffocated by your attention, leading them to further distance themselves from you.

2). Another effect of chasing an avoidant is that they may not actually realize how much they care until you move on. 

The moment they realize that you’re no longer pursuing them and that you have moved on, they may become aware of their feelings for you. 

This could be a difficult realization for them to grapple with, as they may have thought that they did not feel anything at all. 

3). Ultimately, chasing an avoidant is something that should not be taken lightly, as it can lead to either positive or negative outcomes.

It is important to consider the possible consequences before deciding to pursue someone who may not return your affection.

This Is What Happens When You Stop Chasing an Avoidant – Youtube

With that being said, let’s move to the conclusion


In summary, when you stop chasing an avoidant, they may initially feel relieved. 

However, over time they will likely start to realize that something is missing in the relationship and will begin to miss your presence. 

Ultimately, it’s essential to take a step back and give them space so that they can recognize their own feelings and learn how to express themselves in a healthy manner. 

If you do this correctly, then eventually both of you may come together and create a healthier bond for the future.

If you have any questions leave me a comment below to share your opinion and also don’t forget to share it with your friends as well.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why Do People Chase After Avoidants?

There are a few key reasons why people chase after avoidants.

The first is that they may be insecure themselves and need the constant validation that an avoidant can provide. 

Secondly, they may simply be attracted to the challenge that an avoidant presents. 

And lastly, they may be looking for a way to fill an emptiness within themselves that they believe an avoidant can help them with.

How to Stop Chasing an Avoidant?

A beakup man and a woman picture

Stopping the cycle of chasing an avoidant can be difficult, but it’s ultimately worth it for your own well-being and sanity.

Here are some tips on how to stop chasing an avoidant:

1. Make sure your self-esteem is in check. Avoidants often prey on people who have low self-esteem and a fear of abandonment. 

So, make sure your self-worth is not dependent on their behavior and that you love yourself enough to walk away when they don’t give you the emotional connection you need. 

2. Take a step back. Don’t constantly call or text them and don’t always be available. Focus on yourself and find things that make you happy. 

3. Focus on your own needs. Don’t spend all your time trying to make them happy or trying to convince them to stay with you. 

Instead, focus on meeting your own needs first, and if they choose to join you, then great! If not, that’s okay too.

4. Move on. It may be hard, but sometimes the best thing to do is to accept that you may never get the relationship you want from them and move on with your life. 

The more you distance yourself from them, the more likely they will realize what they are missing out on. Avoidants care when you move on; it shows them that they can’t take advantage of you anymore.

Hey there, I'm Khursheed Alam! I started the Deeplines blog to help people benefit from my content. I really believe in loving yourself and being kind, so my goal is to spread that message everywhere. In my free time, I read novels, self-development, and writing books.

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