Why Do Guys Stay in Touch With Ex-Girlfriends? 13 Genuine Reasons

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There are a number of reasons why a guy might stay in touch with an ex-girlfriend. Maybe he’s not over her yet and is hoping to get back together. 

Or, maybe he’s just trying to be friends. Whatever the reason, if you’re not comfortable with it, you need to have a talk with him about it.

If your guy is still talking to his ex, it’s natural to wonder what his motives are. 

Is he trying to get her back? Is he just being friendly? And if so, why does he need to be friendly with her? You may feel like you’re not the only woman in his life anymore, and that can be tough to deal with.

But before you start accusing him of cheating, you need to understand his side of the story. 

There are a few perfectly valid reasons why your man might stay in touch with his ex even after the two of you are together.

So without ‌further let’s dig into it for a better understanding.

Why Do Guys Stay in Touch With Ex-Girlfriends?

A man in blue denim jacket and woman in gray coat talking to each other

If your guy is still talking to his ex, it means that he’s not completely over her yet. 

He might say that he is, but as it is said “actions speak louder than words“. 

If he was really over her, he wouldn’t be keeping in touch with her. He would have moved on and wouldn’t have given her a second thought.

It’s possible that your guy is trying to keep his options open by staying in touch with his ex. 

But this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it isn’t a good sign either. 

With that being said, here are 13 undeniable reasons why guys stay in touch with ex-girlfriends:

1). He’s Not Over Her Yet

This is probably the most common reason why guys stay in touch with their exes. 

If your guy is still hung up on his ex, then it’s likely that he’s not ready to move on from the relationship just yet. 

He may think that by staying in touch with her, he has a better chance of getting back together with her someday. 

Or, he may simply enjoy talking to her and reliving old memories. 

Either way, you must have a conversation with him about it and make sure that his feelings for her don’t get in the way of your relationship.

2). He Still Has Feelings for Her

Even if your guy isn’t actively trying to get back together with his ex, he may still have lingering feelings for her. 

In this case, staying in touch with her could be a way for him to keep those feelings alive. 

You may notice that he talks about her often or brings her up in conversation–all signs that he still has strong feelings for her. 

Again, you must talk to him about how you’re feeling and make sure his relationship with his ex doesn’t interfere with yours.

3). It’s Part Of His Routine

Sometimes guys stay in touch with their exes simply out of habit. It could be something they do every day or something they feel like they need to do to make peace with the past. 

This doesn’t necessarily mean that your guy has any feelings for his ex, but it can still be hurtful nonetheless.

If this is the case, then it’s important to talk to him about how it makes you feel and see if there are ways that he can break the routine without cutting off contact completely. 

4). They Think they are Still Friends

A man in brown coat standing beside a woman in a black coat

Your ex might stay in touch with you even after the breakup is because they are feeling lonely and miss the companionship that you provided. 

Additionally, they may want to keep you as an option in case they don’t find anyone else. Or, they could simply enjoy having someone to talk to about their day-to-day lives.

If your ex is staying in touch with you, it’s important to set boundaries so that you don’t get hurt or lead them on. 

Make it clear to them in case you’re not interested in getting back together, and be direct about what kind of communication you’re comfortable with (e.g., texts, calls, social media). 

By doing this, you’ll protect yourself from getting hurt and help ensure that your ex knows where they stand.

5). He Is Still Attracted to Her

It’s possible that a man still feels attracted to his ex-girlfriend and may reach out in order to see if that spark is still there. 

He may also just be curious to see how she’s been doing since the breakup. It is a sign that he’s not totally over her, or it could be that he’s just looking for some attention from her, with whom he once felt a connection. 

Either way, it’s understandable that if your current partner finds out, it can create feelings of insecurity and jealousy. 

Remember that being attracted to someone isn’t necessarily a bad thing. People can still feel drawn to someone without wanting to act on it. 

A healthy relationship is based on mutual respect, trust, and open communication. If your partner is staying in touch with an ex, talk openly and honestly about it. This can help you both understand each other better and work towards finding a solution that works for both of you.

6). He Has Ties to Her Family

As I mentioned above, there are several reasons why a guy might stay in touch with her ex-girlfriend’s family. 

For one, he might have developed a close relationship with them while he was dating her and simply wants to maintain those ties. Or, he could be trying to keep tabs on his ex through her family members.

In some cases, a guy might stay in touch with an ex-girlfriend’s family because he is hoping to get back together with her someday. 

By staying close to her loved ones, he can keep himself in her life and perhaps make it easier for them to reconcile down the road.

Whatever the reason, communicate with your current partner about your relationship with your ex’s family. 

If you’re not comfortable with your significant other staying in touch with them, then you should voice that concern and come up with a plan that works for both of you.

7). He Is Still Stuck in the Past

A man wearing red knit cap in dark a room

If your guy is still in touch with his ex-girlfriend, it’s natural to wonder what their relationship is like. 

Do they still have feelings for each other? Are they just friends?

It can be tough to figure out what’s going on, but there are some telltale signs that your guy is still stuck in the past. 

Here are a few things to watch out for:

1. He talks about her all the time

If your guy can’t seem to stop talking about his ex, it’s a pretty clear sign that he’s not over her. He might bring her up in conversation constantly, compare you to her, or even try to set you up with one of her friends.

2. He’s always texting or calling her

Even if they’re “just friends,” it’s not normal for your guy to be texting or calling his ex all the time. If he is, it means he’s still invested in her and their relationship – and not in you.

3. He won’t let go of anything from their relationship

Do you feel like your guy is hanging onto every little thing from his past relationship? If he won’t get rid of the gifts she gave him or won’t stop talking about inside jokes, it’s a sign that he hasn’t moved on.

8). They Love Attention, And their Ex Gives it to them

Sometimes, guys will stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they enjoy the attention that they get from them. 

In some cases, a man may be insecure and feel like he needs reassurance from his ex in order to feel better about himself. 

Other times, a man may just crave the validation that comes from staying in touch with someone who used to care deeply about him. 

They may enjoy the feeling of being wanted and desired by an ex. 

Men often stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends for the attention they provide. 

Keep in mind, though, that while it may feel good to receive attention from an ex, it’s not healthy or beneficial to stay in contact with them simply for this purpose. 

If the relationship ended for a reason, then it’s best to leave it in the past and focus on healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

9). They Are Unable to Release the Control they Hold Over Their Ex

There are many reasons why a guy might stay in touch with an ex-girlfriend. Perhaps they were good friends before they dated, or maybe they have remained friends after breaking up. 

However, in some cases, a guy might stay in touch with an ex because he is unable to let go of the control he holds over her.

If a guy is unable to release the control he has over his ex, it can be a toxic situation for both parties involved. 

The guy may try to remain in contact in order to keep tabs on her and see what she is up to. He may also try to interfere in her new relationships or sabotage them altogether. 

This type of behavior is unhealthy and can cause a lot of pain for both the guy and his ex. If you find yourself in this situation, it is best to let go and move on.

10). He Can’t Forget Her

an emotional man leaning on his arms

One reason to stay in touch with an ex-girlfriend is they had a good relationship and he’s hoping to get back together. 

Maybe he’s still in love with her and can’t let go. Or maybe he just wants to keep her as a friend.

However, it’s not always easy for the guy to forget about his ex-girlfriend even if he’s moved on emotionally, she may still hold a special place in his heart. 

He may find himself thinking about her often, wondering what she’s up to and if she’s happy.

It can be tough for the guy to see her moving on with her life without him, but it’s important to remember that everyone has their own journey to take. 

Just because she’s not with him anymore doesn’t mean he has to stop living his life. He can still find happiness, even if it means moving on from his ex-girlfriend for good.

11). You Can’t Let Go of the Routines and the Life You Had Together

It can be really tough to let go of the routines and the life you had together with your ex-girlfriend. 

Even if the relationship didn’t end on the best of terms, it’s still hard to forget about all of the good times you shared. 

If you’re struggling to let go of your ex, here are a few tips that might help:

1. Acknowledge that it’s going to take some time. Don’t expect to be able to move on overnight. It’s okay to feel sad and nostalgic about your past relationship – just don’t dwell on it too much.

2. Keep yourself busy. This is probably one of the best pieces of advice for moving on from a relationship. 

If you find yourself with too much free time, you’re more likely to start thinking about your ex and what could have been. 

Keeping yourself busy will help take your mind off of things and give you a sense of purpose.

3. Reach out to your friends and family. They can provide invaluable support during this difficult time. Talking to someone who cares about you can help you work through your feelings and start to move on.

4. Consider counseling or therapy. If you’re struggling to cope with the breakup, professional help can be very beneficial. A therapist can help you understand your feelings and give you tools for dealing with them in a healthy way.

12). They are Afraid of Being Alone, And Not Finding Someone

Many guys stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they are afraid of being alone. 

They may have been in a relationship for a long time and don’t want to start over from scratch. 

They may also be afraid that they won’t find someone else who makes them feel as good as their ex did. 

With that being said, it’s often normal for guys to stay in touch with an ex than it is to let her go completely.

13. They Want to Make Apologies Because they Feel Bad about How the Relationship Ended

Many guys stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they want to apologize for how the relationship ended. 

They feel bad about the way things ended and want to try to make things right. 

In some cases, they also still have feelings for their ex and want to stay in touch in case things might work out between them again in the future. 

Whatever the reason, if a guy is still talking to his ex, it’s likely that he has some level of feelings for her.

Related reading: What Makes a Man Miss a Woman After a Breakup? 13 Signs


When it comes to staying in touch with an ex-girlfriend, the reasons can be varied and complex. 

While some men may still have strong feelings for their ex, others may simply enjoy the attention or connection that they share. 

However, it’s vital to evaluate why someone would want to stay in touch with an ex. 

If a person’s motives are pure and healthy, there is nothing wrong with staying friends with an ex. 

However, if a person’s motivations are rooted in insecurity or nostalgia, it may be better to let the relationship go. 

Ultimately, trust your own judgment when it comes to the relationships you choose to keep in your lives.


Is It Okay to Be Friends With Your Ex-Girlfriends When You Are in a New Relationship? Why or why not?

It’s a question that we’ve all asked ourselves at one point or another: is it okay to be friends with your ex when you are in a new relationship? 

And while there isn’t a clear-cut answer, there are definitely some things to consider before you decide whether or not to pursue a friendship with your former flame.

1) The Good Reason

Yes, it can be really beneficial to stay friends with an ex. After all, they know you better than anyone and can provide valuable insight and support during tough times. 

Plus, staying friends can help prevent any awkwardness or tension from arising if you happen to run into each other while you’re out with your new partner.

1) The Bad Reason

However, there are also some potential drawbacks to being friends with an ex. 

For example, it’s possible that your new partner may feel threatened or uncomfortable by your close relationship with someone from your past. 

Additionally, if you’re not careful, it’s easy to slip back into old patterns and habits when you’re around your ex, which can ultimately jeopardize your new relationship.

3) It’s Up to You and Your Partner

So ultimately, whether or not it’s okay to be friends with your ex when you’re in a new relationship is something that only you can decide. 
If you do choose to stay friends, just be sure to communicate openly with both your current partner and your ex about what everyone is comfortable with and set clear boundaries to avoid any drama down the road.

Why does my ex want to be my friend when he has a girlfriend?

When an ex-boyfriend reaches out to his ex-girlfriend even though he is in a relationship with someone else, it can be confusing and concerning for the ex-girlfriend. 
There are several possible reasons why an ex-boyfriend might want to stay in contact with his ex-girlfriend even when he is in a new relationship. 

Reason 1) He Still Has Feelings For Her

Even though he may have moved on from their relationship, there is a chance that he still has some lingering feelings and emotions attached to their past. 

He is reaching out to her in order to keep those feelings alive or to see if the flame between them is still there. 

Reason 2) He is Still Attracted to Her Physically 

Even if the relationship ended on bad terms, it’s possible that he is still drawn to her beauty and wants to keep in contact in order to satisfy his own needs. 

Reason 3) He Loves the Attention that His Ex-Girlfriend Gives Him

Some men simply enjoy the validation they get from maintaining contact with their ex, even though they are in a new relationship. 

It is essential to consider all of these possibilities before deciding how to respond to your ex-boyfriend’s reach out. 

If you feel uncomfortable or think it could create problems in your current relationship, then it is best to avoid contact with him altogether. 

On the other hand, if you believe there is still something between you two, then it might be worth exploring further.

Why do men reach out to ex-girlfriends? 

Many guys admit that they stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they are hoping to get back together with them. 

Keep in mind that In most cases, these guys are just trying to rekindle the old flame and see if they can still make things work. 

They may also be hoping that their ex will reach out to them and want to get back together. 

In some cases, guys stay in touch with their exes simply because they are still attracted to them. They enjoy talking to them and flirting with them, even though they know that nothing will come of it. 

These guys may not be interested in getting back together, but they still have feelings for their exes. 

However, some guys stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they are trying to be friends with them. 

They may want to keep the lines of communication open in case they do decide to get back together at some point. 

Other guys may simply enjoy having a female friend to talk to and confide in. 

Last but not least, some guys stay in touch with their ex-girlfriends because they feel the need to keep an eye on them. They are concerned that their ex is seeing someone else or that she is moving on without him. By staying in touch, these guys feel like they can keep tabs on what she is doing and who she is seeing.

Hey there, I'm Khursheed Alam! I started the Deeplines blog to help people benefit from my content. I really believe in loving yourself and being kind, so my goal is to spread that message everywhere. In my free time, I read novels, self-development, and writing books.

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